Everything in Shinjuku is so close by, I leave the apartment thinking I'm going on a shopping expedition but come back 15 minutes later with everything I needed...

....this is despite the fact that very few people understand what I'm asking for - they say they speak English but they seem afraid to say anything. I guess it's my job to fix that - saw an ad for my company (Gaba Corporation) on the platform today (God knows what it says):